No, Grandma, Listen, Double-Click The Chrome Icon
Nov 30, 2012
Want to freak out your neighbors?
Want to freak out your neighbors?
Name your wifi...
"FBI Surveillance Van"
Getting Old
Am I the only one that when somebody says "10 years ago", thinks about 90's instead of 2002?
Math Problem - John has 32 candy bars...
MATH PROBLEM
John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now?
Diabetes.
John has diabetes.
I Before E - Busted!
i before e...
except when you run a feisty heist on a weird beige foreign neighbor
Nov 29, 2012
Christmas Beetle
Christmas beetle is a name commonly applied to the Australian beetle genus Anoplognathus. They are known as Christmas beetles because they are abundant in both urban and rural areas close to Christmas. Christmas beetles are large (20-30 mm long) members of the scarab family that are noisy and clumsy fliers, similar to the cockchafers of Europe. They typically have elytra that are a dark or light brown, or green, in some species with a green-yellow iridescence.The genus includes 35 species, several of which have been implicated in dieback of eucalypts. Anoplognathus pallidicollis is the species most commonly observed and associated with the name of Christmas beetle.
Rudolf the Reindeer Gets his Revenge
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| All of the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names. USED TO |
Nov 28, 2012
Nov 27, 2012
Patrick Starr's Bright Idea
"Lets take all the Muslim protesters who get offended by internet videos...and move them away from the internet."
The Best Anti-Smoking Ad
The most touching anti-smoking ad! Do watch this and tag in your loved ones. Keep them informed.
Nov 25, 2012
Men are like...
-Men are like - Floor Tiles
If you lay them right the first time, you can walk all over them for years!
-Men are like - Bank Accounts
Without a lot of money, they don’t generate much interest.
-Men are like -Blenders
You need one, but you’re not quite sure why.
-Men are like - Chocolate Bars
Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.
-Men are like -Coffee
The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long.
-Men are like -Commercials
You can’t believe a word they say.
-Men are like -Computers ,,,)
Hard to figure out and never have enough memory
-Men are like - Eskys
Load them with beer and you can take them anywhere.
-Men are like -Copiers
You need them for reproduction, but that’s about it.
-Men are like -Curling Irons
They’re always hot, and they’re always in your hair.
-Men are like -Government Bonds
They take so long to mature.
-Men are like -High Heels
They’re easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.
-Men are like -Horoscopes
They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.
-Men are like - Lava Lamps
Fun to look at, but not all that bright!
-Men are like -Mascara
They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
-Men are like - Parking Spots
The good ones are already taken and the ones that are left are handicapped.
-Men are like -Popcorn
They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
-Men are like - Place Mats
They only show up when there’s food on the table.
-Men are like - Snow Storms
You never know when they’re coming, how many inches you’ll get or how long they'll last.
-Men are like - Used Cars
Both are easy to get, cheap, and unreliable.
-Men are like - ATM’s
Once they withdraw they lose interest.
-Men are like -Bananas
The older they get, the less firm they are.
-Men are like -Newborn Babies
They’re cute at first, but you get tired of cleaning up their crap.
-Men are like - Crystal
Some look really good, but you can still see right through them.
-Men are like - Dry Cleaners
Most work fast and leave no ring.
-Men are like - Laxatives
They irritate the shit out of you.
Nov 22, 2012
Meat Your Maker
When you sit down on Thursday and give thanks, start perhaps with the fact you’re not eating the (Petri) dish above. At least not yet.
What you’re looking at is not “synthetic” meat, but in vitro or cultured. Apparently, there’s a difference. Synthetic meat typically refers to imitation edible animal tissue made from a vegetable source, often soy or gluten. In vitro meat (which has other monikers, including the less-than-appetizing “shmeat”) is grown from scratch using muscle cells.
“This is real meat because it is made of the same cells that meat is composed of,” said Gabor Forgacs, one of the men behind Modern Meadow, a company with plans to use three-dimensional bioprinting to eventually produce in vitro edible meat products. (The company will start first with simple leather products because it’s easier to create and grow skin cells than muscle.)
While there’s no obvious demand for in vitro meat at the moment, its proponents say there is a need. Natural meat – the kind that originates from actual animals – is increasingly expensive, ecologically speaking. Using conventional methods, it takes 6.7 pounds of cattle feed, 52.8 gallons of water, 74.5 square feet of land and 1,036 BTUs of fossil fuel energy (enough energy to power a microwave oven for 18 minutes) to produce a quarter-pound of hamburger, according to the Journal of Animal Science.
In vitro meat production requires only a fraction of those resources.
However, don’t go looking for a lab-grown steak anytime soon. Technological advances have made bioprinting – a process in which biological elements like cells in a liquid form can be laid down upon each other in complex, three-dimensional formulations – more feasible, but nobody’s making anything yet that resembles a turkey breast or pork chop. Indeed, Modern Meadows short-term goal is to print edible slivers of meat two centimeters by one centimeter, less than half a millimeter thick.
Nov 18, 2012
Google SEO Synergy
I would like to know if Google using synergism between the Google search engine and it's other companies/projects.
For example, I am blogging with the Google product Blogger and my blog has another Google product, which is Adsense so more specifically, my question is: Does using Blogger and Adsense (and any other Google products) have an impact on search results from Google searches?
Of course Google being the big company that it is, having many well thought out Policies and standards, so when Google is searching through countless web pages, and it comes across one that it is affiliated with it could be more inclined to give a page with Google content on it a higher ranking in search results. But the Google web crawler is a computer and cant make decisions, such as one regarding nepotism. However the program was created and maintained by humans and Google is a company, so it is entirely possible for the programmers or anyone involved to have made a decision to tell the crawler to give a preferential treatment to Google affiliates.
And we cant deny that instructing the Google search engine to direct traffic to Google affiliates isn't a good strategy because between sending a visitor to a site with Google affiliate content is much better for Google than sending the visitor to some site that has no Google content.
I see nothing wrong with Google search giving preferential rankings to Google affiliate, because ultimately search engine is only giving a list of options to the searcher based on inputted criteria, it is up to the discretion of the searcher to decide what it is they are looking for. And if Google search engine started just displaying page after page of Google only content, the control of traffic would increase for a short amount of time, but would inevitably decrease due to irrelevant results as an ineffective search engine and people would stop using it.
Some More Japanese McDonald's Spoofs
Nov 10, 2012
The Avengers: Hulk vs Thor
9 Celebrities High School Photos, You Wont Believe
Rihanna
Selena Gomez
Gwen Stefani
Taylor Swift
Trace Cyrus
Zac Effron
Ryan Seacrest
Justin Bieber
Camal Attack Caught on Camera
Susie, stop feeding your brother to the animals.
Everyone loves a little head now & then.
Stop squirming, Billy! The last 5 pics are all blurry!!!
How many licks does it take to get to the center of a.....
hey.. does he taste like chicken?
And I was like Nawm Nawm Nawm Nawm
See, I told you.. Tastes like chicken..
I GOT ANOTHER ONE SHIRLEY!
At first I was like hey, then she was like heyyy, but then I was like get in my belly!!!!!
Stop calling my friend an ASS!
Nov 8, 2012
Mitt Romney: "If the President is Re-Elected"
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| Romney: IF THE PRESIDENT IS RE-ELECTED, 8 MILLION AMERICANS WILL BE UNEMPLOYED Obama: 8 MILLION AND ONE. |
Time spent using Tupperware
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| Storing fresh food Storing rotten food Searching for the right fucking lid. |
Optical Illusion
Optical illusions prove human senses are fallible, that what you see does not always correspond to reality. People tend to think of optical illusions as tricks in books, but they actually effect nearly every part of modern life as the eye's capacity to be manipulated is what makes all print and visual media possible. Learning some facts about optical illusions is to learn essen
tial information for understanding the information age.
History
In the ancient world, people didn't know if optical illusions were the "fault" of the eyes or the mind. The first recorded theorizers on optical illusions were the Greek thinkers Epicharmus and Protagorus in 450 BCE. Epicharmus implicated the body whereas Protagorus implicated the mind. One hundred years later, Aristotle came up with a view balancing these extremes. In the twentieth century, artists began experimenting with illusions, in a movement known as optical art or "op art." By challenging the viewer to make sense of all sides of the illusion, op art made its audience participants in the artwork.How Optical Illusions Work
Optical illusions occur when what the eyes see conflicts with what the brain expects. For example, if a series of concentric unconnected curved lines appears like a spiral, it is because the brain is so accustomed to perceiving such figures as spirals that it takes work to realize the drawing is, in fact, not a continuous spiral. Similarly, the "infinite staircase" illusion is possible, in part, because the brain is so used to the length of a drawing representing three-dimensional height.Dithering
Nearly all forms of media are optical illusions. Print in books and newspapers is not made up of solid letters, but are in fact dots of black, red, yellow and blue ink placed so closely together the mind perceives them as solid. Television screens work in a similar way -- images on screen are not always the colors they appear to be but are in fact tiny dots of red, blue and green light projected so closely together that they are perceived as all different colors. This illusion of making a full-color image from only primary colors is called dithering.Movies and Colorblindness
Movies are possible because of principle called "persistence of vision," the principle that images remain on the eye for 1/17 of a second, meaning images flashed faster than that (most movies are shot at 24 frames per second) cannot be perceived as separate images, creating the illusion of moving images. Common colorblindness tests are types of optical illusions. Everyone sees the same image, but a normal sighted person perceives the pattern of dots in a circle as one number, and colorblind people will perceive different numbers depending on their type of colorblindness."Barack Obama & Batman" Coincidence?
Obama: Sworn in as a Senator
Film: Batman Begins
2008
Obama: Wins Presidency
Film: The Dark Knight
2012
Obama: Re-elected as President
Film: The Dark Knight Rises
Coincidence?
Nov 7, 2012
US President Obama’s 2012 Election Victory Speech
President Barack Obama delivered a victory speech after winning re-election over Mitt Romney, Tuesday, from Obama campaign headquarters – McCormick Place, Lakeside Center in Chicago, IL. Read on:-
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much.
Tonight more than 200 years after a former colony won the right to determine its own destiny, the task of perfecting our union moves forward.
It moves forward because of you. It moves forward because you reaffirmed the spirit that has triumphed over war and depression, the spirit that has lifted this country from the depths of despair to the heights of hope. The belief that while each of us will pursue our own individual dreams, we are an American family and we rise or fall together as one nation and as one people.
Tonight in this election, you, the American people, remind us while our road has been hard, while our journey has been long, we have picked ourselves up, we have fought our way back, and we know in our hearts that the united states of America – the best is yet to come.
[cheering]
I want to thank every American who participated in this election [CHEERING] Whether you voted for the very first time or waiting in line for a very long time.
By the way, we need to fix that. Whether you pounded the pavement or picked up the phone. Whether you held an Obama sign or a Romney sign, you made your voice heard.
And you made a difference. I just got off the phone with Governor Romney and I congratulated him and Paul Ryan on a hard-fought campaign. [CHEERING] We may have fought fiercely, but it’s only because we love this country deeply. And we care so strongly about its future.
From George to Lenore to their son Mitt, the Romney family has chosen to give back to Americans through public service. And that is a legacy that we honor and applaud tonight. [CHEERING] In the weeks ahead, I also look forward to sitting down with Governor Romney to talk about where we can work together to move this country forward. [CHEERING] I want to thank my friend and partner for the last four years, America’s happy warrior, the best vice president anybody could ever hope for: Joe Biden.
I want to thank my friend and partner of the last 4 years, America’s happy warrior, the best Vice President anyone could ever hope for: Joe Biden. And I wouldn’t be the man I am today without the woman who agreed to marry me twenty years ago. Let say this publicly, Michelle I have never loved you more. I have never been prouder to watch the rest of America fall in love with you too as our nation’s first lady.
Sasha and Malia before our very eyes you are growing up to become two strong smart beautiful young women, just like your mom. And I'm so proud of you guys. But I will say that for now one dog is probably enough. To the best campaign team and volunteers in the history of politics. The best. The best ever. Some of you were this time around.
Some of you were new this time around and some of you have been at my side since the very beginning but all of you are family.
No matter what you do or where you go from here, you will carry the memory of the history we made together and you will have the life long appreciation of a grateful president.
Thank you for believing all the way, through every hill, through every valley. [applause] You lifted me up the whole way and I will always be grateful for everything that you’ve done and all the incredible work that you’ve put in. [applause]
I know that political campaigns can sometime seem small, even silly, and that provides plenty of fodder for the cynics who tell us that politics is nothing more than a contest of egos or the domain of special interests.
But if you ever get the chance to talk to folks who turn out at rallies and crowded out along a rope line in a high school gym or saw folks working late at a campaign office in some tiny county far away from home, you’ll discover something else; you’ll hear the determination in the voice of a young field organizer who is working his way through college and wants to make sure every child has that same opportunity. [applause]
You’ll hear the pride in the voice of a volunteer who is going door to door because her brother was finally hired when the local auto plant added another shift. [applause]
You’ll hear the deep patriotism in the voice of a military spouse who is working the phones late at night to make sure that no one who fights for this country every has to fight for a job or a roof over their head when they come home. [applause]
That’s why we do this. That’s what politics can be. That’s why elections matter. It’s not small, it’s big. It’s important. Democracy in a nation of 300-million can be noisy and messy and complicated. We have our own opinions, each of us has deeply held beliefs.
And when we go through tough times, when we make big decisions as a country; it necessarily stirs passions, stirs up controversy. That won’t change after tonight and it shouldn’t . These arguments we have are a mark of our liberty.
We can never forget that as we speak, people in distant nations are risking their lives right now just for a chance to argue about the issues that matter [applause] The chance to cast their ballots like we did today.
But despite all our differences, most of us share certain hopes for America’s future. We want our kids to grow up in a country where they have access to the best schools and the best teachers. [applause] A country that lives up to its legacy as the global leader in technology and discovery and innovation; with all the good jobs and new businesses that follow.
A country that lives up to its legacy as a global leader in technology, discovery and innovation. With all the good jobs and businesses that follow, to live in America that isn’t burdened by debt, that isn’t weakened by inequality. That isn’t threatened by the destructive power of a warming planet. We want to pass on a country that is saved and respected and admired around the world. A nation that is defended by the strongest military on earth and the best troops this world has ever known. But also a country that moves with confidence beyond this time of war to shape a peace. That is built on the promise of dignity of every human being.
We believe in a generous America, in a compassionate America, in a tolerant America, open to the dreams of an immigrants daughter that studies in our schools and pledges to our flag. To the young boy on the south side of Chicago, who sees a light beyond the nearest street corner. To the furniture workers child in North Carolina who wants to become a engineer or a scientist. And engineer or an entrepreneur. A diplomat or even a president, that’s the future we hope for. That’s the vision we share, that’s where we need to go. Forward. That’s where we need to go.
Now we will disagree sometimes fiercely on how to get there, as it has for more then two centuries, progress will come in fits and starts, it’s not always a straight line or a smooth path. By itself a recognition of our common hopes and dreams won’t end the gridlock. Or solve all our problems or substitute for the hard work of building consensus. And making the difficult compromises needed to move the country forward but that common bond is where we must begin. Our economy is recovering, our decade of war is ending. A long campaign is now over. [applause]
And whether I earned your vote or not, I have listened to you. I have learned from you and you have made me a better President. With your stories and your struggles, I returned to the White House more determined and more inspired than ever about the work there is to do and the future that lies ahead [applause] Tonight, you voted for action, not politics as usual. You elected us to focus on your jobs, not ours.
And in the coming weeks and months, I am looking forward to reaching out and working with leaders of both parties to meet the challenges we can only solve together: reducing our deficit, reforming our tax code, fixing our immigration system, freeing ourselves from foreign oil, we’ve got more work to do.
But that doesn’t mean your work is done. The role of citizen in our democracy does not end with your vote. America’s never been about what could be done for us, it’s about what can be done by us, together, through the hard and frustrating but necessary work of self-government. That’s the principle we were founded on.
This country has more wealth than any nation, but that’s not what makes us rich. We have the most powerful military in history but that’s not what makes us strong. Our university, our culture, are all the envy of the world but that’s not what keeps the world coming to our shores. What makes America exceptional are the bonds that hold together the most diverse nation on Earth, the belief that our destiny is shared, that this country only works when we accept certain obligations to one another and the future generations so that the freedom so many Americans have fought for and died for comes with responsibilities as well as rights, and among those are love, and charity, and duty and patriotism. That’s what makes America great.
I am hopeful tonight because I have seen that spirit at work in America. I’ve seen it in the family business whose owners would rather cut their own pay than lay off their neighbors, and in the workers who would rather cut back their hours than see a friend lose a job.
I’ve seen it in the soldiers who re-enlist after losing a limb, and in those SEALS who charged up the stairs into darkness and danger because they knew their was a buddy behind them watching their back.
I’ve seen it on the shores of New Jersey and New York where leaders from every party and level of government have swept aside their differences to help a community rebuild from the wreckage of a terrible storm.
And I saw it just the other day, in Mentor, Ohio where a father told the story of his eight-year-old daughter who’s long battle with leukemia nearly cost their family everything had it not been for health care reform passing just a few months before. The insurance company was about to stop paying for her care
I had an opportunity to not just talk to the father but meet this incredible daughter of his, and when he spoke to the crowd listening to that father’ story, every parent in that room had tears in their eyes because we knew that little girl could be our own. And I know that every American wants her future to be just as bright. That’s who we are. That’s the country I’m so proud to lead as your president.
And tonight, despite all the hardship we’ve been through, despite all the frustrations of Washington, I’ve never been more hopeful about our future
I’ve never been more hopeful about America. And I ask you to sustain that hope. I’m not talking about blind optimism. The kind of hope that just ignores the enormity of the tasks ahead or the road blocks that stand in our path. I’m not talking about the wishful idealism that allows us to just sit on the sidelines or shirk from a fight.
I have always believed that hope is that stubborn thing inside of us that insists, despite all the evidence to the contrary, that something better awaits us so long as we have the courage to keep reaching to keep working, to keep fighting.
America, I believe we can build on the progress we made and continue to fight for new jobs and new opportunity and new security for the middle class
I believe we can keep the promise of our founder. The idea that if you’re willing to work hard, it doesn’t matter who you are or where you come from or what you look like or where you love, it doesn’t matter if you’re black or white or Hispanic or Asian, or native American, or young or old, or rich or poor, able, disabled, gay or straight, you can make it.
I believe we can seize this future together. Because we are not as divided as our politics suggest. We’re not as cynical as the pundents believe. We are greater than the sum of our individual ambitions.
And we remain more than a collection of red states and blue states. We are and forever will be the United States of America. With your help and God’s grace, we will continue our journey forward. And remind the world just why it is that we live in the greatest nation on Earth.Thank you, America. God bless you. God bless these United States.”
Nov 6, 2012
Canadian's thoughts on US elections
As a Canadian for all my life, I'm not completely knowledgeable about the United States' political system.
I know it's a two party system and facts like that. But what I think. I think it would be in the United States best interest to elect Mitt Romney, because what I know about him is he's a capitalist, I would expect him to run the county like a business, cut costs, make logical decisions and ultimately turn a profit. Which is something America desperately needs these days. Obama has had 4 years and the US is still on the brink of a depression and as one of the greatest economies in the world, if the US goes into a depression that would have a terrible impact on the rest of the world, including my beloved nation of Canada.
Watching C-Span at the moment, it seems like Obama is going to win the election despite the Republican's early lead.
I deeply hope for the United States' economy to recover and return to a thriving economy as it once was. And have learned from it's mistakes. In addition to the US being Canada's closest economic partner, I have a personal investment in the United States well-being.
On a brighter note, Barack has been the President of the United States for the past four years which would be a positive in the case of his victory because his administration has ongoing projects and objectives that may continue, uninterrupted, and potentially aid the US economy.
In my opinion the American people see Republican's as cold, corporate machines that put the rich first, and the Democrats as a more warm and friendly candidate, so the average voter will be more likely to vote Democrat because they want to protect themselves as the middle class.
Experts say the middle class is dying, not only in North America but all around the world. The world economy would be better off to start preparing for a world without a middle class.
This United States Presidency Election is a nail biting event that I can't wait to see who is declared the winner, and follow the progress of the 2012-2016 United States President and his progress and the impact it has on the rest of the world.
Nov 4, 2012
Captain America - A Woman's Dream Man
 | ||
| I just saw The Avengers, Captain America is so dreamy in it! Why do girls like Captain America so much? Because he's hunky and seems like he knows how to treat a lady. You do realize he's from the 40's, right? You yacketty dumb broad, iron my shorts to hard again and I'll give you another shot in the mouth, ya hear me? Also, don't vote. |
Woody Hires Bounty Hunters
Education sometimes it's weird
A, B+ = Teacher
B, C+, C, D+, D = Salaryman
F = CEO
Cheat! = Politician
Undergraduate - Billionaire
Can I have Your Number?
On their phone text REDCROSS to 90999 so they will donate $10 to the Hurricane Disaster Relief Fund.
