Superhero Mathematics: You do the Math

Man + American Flag = Captain America
Man - Heart = Ironman
Man + Thunder = Thor
Man + Anger = Hulk
Man + Spider = Spider-Man
Superman + Kryptonite = Man
Man - Parents = Batman

Carnage Spiderman and Venom Dancing in the Street

Carnage (Left), Spider-Man (Center) and Venom (Right)
Dancing in the Streets, paining the town red.

Spider-Man's Successors

Spider-man isn't a very good superhero in my eyes. He's not impressive, strong, moral or possess any classic traits of a true superhero. So what does he have to offer? I for one am intrigued by the Spider-man's alter egos. They are Venom (all black costume, sometimes looks blue in the light) and Carnage (all red with black veins). Venom and Carnage are both villains and they are cooler than most superheroes. I don't know if they have any allies, comrades or even cognitive thoughts, they seem like vicious monsters, like the evil that escaped and mutated from the Spider-man and became their own entities. Uncontrollable, unstoppable and unreasonable. How could two such incredible creations have derived from Spider-man, the dorky student who's superpower is the ability to make things sticky.

Instead of another Spider-Man movie they need to make a movie featuring Venom and Carnage, destroying everything and bringing death and destruction in their wake. Maybe start the story with Spider-Man falling to the accumulated force of Spider-Man's combined foes, as Spider-Man is about to be slain, Venom and Carnage emerge from wherever it is they originate from, have a glorious battle with the Goblin, Doctor Octopus, Raven and all the other villains. When the dust settles after the slaughter, Spider-Man struggles to stand to his feet and greet his saviors, but being pure evil as they are, Venom and Carnage  pin Spidey and slay him themselves. And the duo spend the remainder of the movie on a super-powered rampage of senseless evil and chaos.

(Spider-Man, Venom and Carnage Illustrations)

Superhero Subway System

I can understand why Spider-Man would be taking the subway, because he's poor, but he can swing around the city, maybe it's too cold outside. But why does Iron Man need to take the subway, he's rich. Also he can fly and is way faster than Spider-Man or the subway. And the other three are all scientists so they should be able to afford a better mode of transportation, or even build their own flying cards.

I don't think these are the real superheroes.

Superhero Money Fight

Batman and Iron Man battle it out with fists full of cash. And who should show up, none other than Spider-Man, the poorest superhero of all time. Spidey needs money for school and books and such.

The Amazing Spider-Lizard

Takes Two To Tango

Slow down, you're gonna kill us both

Yo dawg I herd u like..  wat
Yo dawg I he.. wat
Yo daw.. wat
NVM  cool story bro.

Just went shopping and came home with a new calculator!

CHOO CHOO CHOOOO!!!
Hurry up Thomas.

Dinner at Marvel

The Scarlet Witch baked a loaf of fresh french bread for; Wolverine, Captain America, Spider-man, Iron Man and Hulk. But turns into an intervention for Wolverine about his hand washing regiment.

Who wants French Bread?

Allow me..
**Slice**

...What?

 Dude, weren't you, like, slicing up zombies with those claws last night?

I washed'em!

Man, I've never seen him wash those things. Just pops'em back into his forearms every time.
I think I'm gonna hurl.

I just did.

Hulk Smash Puny French.

Another Superhero Evolution Depiction

I would say the costumes have gotten better over time. I look forward to seeing what snazzy new get-ups are to come in the future.

The Hulk

- 1978
- 2003
- 2008

 

Spider-Man

- 1977
- 2002
- 2012

 

Superman

- 1948
- 1951
- 1978
- 1993
- 2006
- 2012

 

Batman

- 1966
- 1989
- 1995
- 1997
- 2005
- 2008